Living on your own

Adolescent is the gap between sexual and economical maturity. In the 1820's girls reached sexual maturity at 16 and boys at 18. In the 1820's girls and boys were economically mature at 18-20. Today girls are sexually mature at the earliest 8 and boy at 12. Today youth are economically mature at 26-28. Why is this so? It seems like in the 1820's life was perfect, once you were sexually mature you were economically mature. Youth are becoming to mature too fast. This means were need to teach our children at a younger age the ways of life. 

Divorce

70% of divorced married people 2 years later say that could have and should have fixed it and stayed married.

70% of men after divorce are remarried.

75% of people rated their marriage very low, 5 yrs. later that rated it higher

Divorce

Hostility

é

Disappointment

=

discouragement

6 Stations of Divorce

1-emotional

--loss of trust respect and affection towards each other

2- legal

--courts officially ends marriage

3- economical- 1/2

4- Co- Parental – joint

5- Community

6- Psychic

Parenting

When you become a parent you are able to get re-parented as you parent your child.
Here is a list of the few purposes of parenting...
-develops a capacity to love
-learn to understand God
-learn how to serve
-become selfless
-children help you understand God
-safe envioronment
-forced to encounter challenges
-help prepare and protect our children to survive and thrive in the world to live in

Fatherhood

Fathers have a great influence on their children. An influence that is equal to that of the mothers. I was fortunate enough to grow up with a wonderful involved father. So I have seen the impact and father can make in a child. Here are 5 of the most important factors a father can show his child:
1) Fathers play differently
2) Fathers parent differently
3) Fathers build confidence
4) Fathers prepare children for the real world
5) Fathers provide a look at the world of men
I think it is important to have activities with just the child and father. When my dad and I would have these we would go to dinner, movies, bike rides, boating, and fishing. We did activities we both enjoyed. Sometimes my dad would even do activities I liked, like shopping, When my dad would come to the mall with me I knew he hated it, but he never complained, I really appreciated those times because I knew he just wanted to be with me.

Communication

I know it sounds kind of cliche, but communication is the keystone of marriage. Communication is used all the time. Wether it is with our eyes, body movements, expressions, or words. If you do not make eye contact with someone for hours, doesn't that make you seem like they are mad? Without communication conflict tends to come up. Conflict means disagreement and arguing. In order to avoid conflict there needs to be communication. A little conflict is okay, but not confronting it makes it worse.

Crisis in the Family

Crisis in the family causes more stress, but if you look at it positively can help make the family unit stronger. There are many types of crisis in the family: divorce, death, separation, abandonment, ect. How we deal with this situation with either strengthen our families or separate them even more. I have learned that communication is a key component is dealing with family stressors. If a husband and wife are not on the same page there can be much confusion within the entire family. I think that dealing with crisis should be a family decision, so everyone feels involved and everything is discussed.

The Birds and the Bees

This week in class we discussed intimacy during marriage. While learning more about that what I learned most was how marriage is all about scarifies and becoming selfless. Marriage is a Godly. We also discussed sex ed in schools. I never realized how important it is for your children to feel comfortable to come to their parents for questions, but it is. In another class this week we were talking about how to talk to your children about sex. He knew of one man who talk to his sons every could of years about it. When his children were 8, 12, 16, and 21 they would have a chat. I think this just needs to be a comfortable open conversation. I think those are great ages to talk to your children about it. I think that talking about what it happening in their life and the changes going on should be discussed, nothing too advance or premature. 

Here is a link about suggestions for parenting your children: 

https://www.lds.org/manual/a-parents-guide

Baby Time

In class this week we discussed the role of the husband during pregnancy. I thought of five specific things wives can do to engage their husbands fully before, during and after delivery of their child. 

I think that it is crucial to have the husband fully engaged in the pre birth and after birth life of the child. Five things a wife can help the father do to be engaged during the delivery and after are:

1)      Bring the husband to doctor’s appointments.

-I believe that the baby is as much of the mother’s child as it is the father’s.

2) Take your husband to birthing classes.

            - You should take your husband to these classes so he will feel more comfortable with the whole birthing situation. The more informed he is the more help and comfort he will be to the wife during birth.

3) Buy baby clothes/accessories together.

-Most husbands’ probably wont want to go shopping for the baby, but it could help a lot. This is a way most women get excited to have a baby. It could also help the husband get excited too.
4) Have husband stay home with you instead of the typical grandma.

-I think that the grandma sometimes takes the place of the father too often after the birth. The father should be the one home with the new mother. Not only for help of the mother, but to gain a relationship with the baby. The mother and father should learn how to take care of the newborn baby together.

5) Father should get up at night as much as the mother.

            -The father should be help during the night because the mother needs rest to recovery. During the night the father can gain a closer relationship with the baby, since he is probably at work for most of the day.